Dear Socrates Safo…

Socrates Safo makes bad movies for a living but he could be so much more than that. Kwame Appiah sends a friendly word to prod him in the right direction.So as it turns out, you have become quite the force in the local movie industry. Not bad for a man who started out as the guy holding up the lights while others got the real work of movie making done. Well done. You made good.

Over here, we are big fans of grass to grace stories. We love a good boy-from-the-sticks-done-good modern fairy tale thingy as much as the next guy. But the thing is, SS (can we call you that?), you’ve began to trouble us.
Let’s be brutally frank. Your movies are sh*t. There we said it. We love you, SS, so we want to tell you the truth.

Kyeiwaa may have made it a lot of money but it was a bad movie. And at 13 installments, even your best friends were beginning to grumble. Some of the actors wanted you to stop, SS but they just couldn’t bring themselves to tell you. Why did you do that? Why?

Hot Fork was anything but hot. And what was the movie about? Do you even know? Frankly, that movie was only good for the trailer that it spawned, deceiving gullible people into buying it. Some might call it clever. Heck! Even we can’t fail to see that. But is that what you want to be remembered for?

You are so much better than that, SS. Really, you are.
Lately, we are beginning to hear stories about you shaving your actresses yourself! Now that is a slick move when pulled by an over-enthusiastic Romeo but from a movie producer, it makes people ask questions, SS. And when your catalogue includes a movie called Hot Fork, people can easily misunderstand you.

So your friends here at PULSE have decided to offer you some advice. You may decide not to take it. It’s your choice to make but it would be so much better if you did.

First, drop the blade. It’s not cool. And if you must, make sure it’s with the wifey. You do have a wife, right? Think about her. She must be hurting.

Have you heard of a script? It’s a pretty cool thing that guides movie makers, enabling them to finish a story in 120 running minutes and still make sense. Of course, holding up the lights, you may not have seen this side of things. We don’t hold that against you, man. You are salt of the earth type, guided by instinct. We appreciate that. But it’s time to make movies that make sense. Look at Shirley Frimpong-Manso, she tries without the greatest of success and still manages to make money. And between the two of you, it’s you we are pulling for. Get a script, SS and stick to it.

To recap, Kyeiwaa was over-long. Don’t do that again. We don’t want to go on about this (get it? brevity), but that was a nadir in a career that well, has included Hot Fork. So we’ll make this short just so you get the point: don’t make a movie that has more than 3 parts. That only works if you are making Police Academy and God knows you aren’t. Or haven’t.

Which is not to say that you can’t. A script, remember? Get one. Ask Akorfa.

Finally, SS, and this is just a personal thing. You are not exactly the knowledgeable pundit on cultural issues. Stop pretending to be one on that Peace FM show with those annoying guys. That’s not you. When was the last time Carlos Sakyi entered a studio where music is made? Leave them to talk. Concentrate on your core business. And improve it.

Get a script.

You can make it, SS. We’ll be pulling for you. And watching you.


Kwame and the guys at PULSE!